Happy Birthday Wendy

She would have been three years old today. Three! It doesn't sound like very long somehow. So much has changed though. Here I am looking out the window in front of my desk at a meadow, fir trees along the edge of it. A bald eagle could go by any time, the dog is out hunting, the sun is watery and northern. Three years ago it was hot, sunny, crowded. It is Dia de Candelaria in Mexico today, here it is Groundhog Day, I don't know if it saw its shadow or not.
And here we are, a family of four? Or are we five? I still haven't come to a conclusion about how many children I have. Some days it feels like three. Some days it feels like two, but never without a dose of guilt for leaving one out. But whichever, we are a family, we are together. Three years ago that was hardly a forgone conclusion and so I'm grateful to Wendy. She woke us up, gave us each a good long shake, a smack in the face and pointed us back in the right direction. So thank you Wendy, beautiful little daughter. I wish I could hold you again. One day.

Bunny's Room before and after

As appropriate as a bunch of carrots might seem for bunny's bedroom, my Bunny wanted pink.



And so I gave her pink. And she likes it! One of these days we'll have to change out that ugly old rug, but it might be a while.




Other than that I've been running, even if I haven't remembered to log my miles here. Yesterday I did 7.5 with my new running partner and friend K who is training for her first marathon as well. Hers is in the beginning of May so I have quite a bit more time to train than she does. However, her plan only has her do 18 miles as her longest run before the race. In a perfect world I'd like to do the whole 26.2 beforehand, just so I know I can do it. So I may tag along on her training plan and then continue to add miles up to taper time in July. It was a sweet feeling to find that 7.5 was nice and easy, if slow. So I'll have to take a good look at some training plans and the calendar and see how to fit it all together.

Checking in

2 miles run today
5.2 run yesterday.

Yes, the tenths and hundredths count too.

Dh and the Bunny are still in Mexico. They'll be there for 3.5 weeks. 2 weeks to go. It feels like they've been gone for longer. The little Raccoon and I are doing pretty well on our own. We're staying up later and sleeping in later than usual. We're also watching more movies and the whole second season of 30 Rock. I'm loving it, the Raccoon loves Tracy Jordan but I don't think she's getting all the references. That's okay, she is only 16 months old after all. I'm beginning to wonder if she'll skip the Princesses since she's already showing a strong preference for rocking out to Hannah Montana. We'll see, I'll keep my fingers crossed. No, it would be okay if she wants to embrace Princessy shit. I can handle it. It's just a little depressing. And we did that once.

Other than hanging with little Raccoon I'm trying to get a few small jobs off the to-do list. Today I got the license plates for the Jeep (finally), licensed the dog (finally), got the Bunny signed up for swimming lessons, missed lessons for the Raccoon by 1 (one!) child. I'm bummed, especially since I stopped by to register earlier in the week but got there before the office was open. But we're first on the waiting list so let's all cross our fingers that someone flakes. I also got the dining room wall plastered yesterday. IRL it wasn't bugging me but anytime I saw a photo of the space it was really annoying. So that's done. And I got the remains of our tarp hangar dismantled and the tarp folded and put away. The poor thing was destroyed in a wind storm here. The wind snapped the aluminum poles in half, pretty insane.

Today I got an exciting present from my Dingo sister in WI. She sent me a scoby! It sounds so illicit doesn't it? Well, in fact I think it may be. but all it really is is a fungus for making kombucha a fermented tea that drinkers swear is the elixir of life. Or nearly. So, now all I need is a big galloon jar and a warm spot and I'll see if I become a believer or not.

Happy Belated New Year!

Well here I am! In 2009. I keep writing 08 on checks but I hope I'm not the only one who needs a little time to adjust. This year I need more time to adjust than normal since I was off visiting my mom. That trip was more or less uneventful. She hasn't changed but she's forever repentant. But whatever.

Now, one might think that since I've had twelve days to consider resolutions I'd have a pretty slick list but I'm not sure I do. But here goes:

• Run the San Francisco Marathon, hopefully in 6:00 or less so I can get my official finisher's coaster. This one entails staying disciplined throughout my 7 months of training. That's going to be the hardest part I think.
  
• Be Kind.
• Spend more time playing with kids than surfing online. To be honest I might be pretty close here already, but I feel like I'm online more than I should be and playing less than I should be so here's to fixing that.
• Get off sugar. This one I'm already doing okay on too. I'd like to kick the habit that climaxed over the holiday. So far so good. I haven't had nearly any since I got home and haven't really wanted any either.

Well, that's it. I want to keep it simple and attainable. And, hopefully I'll also be able to keep this blog more or less updated to keep track of life, training runs, kid cuteness or whatever, but that may be dependent on the surfing < playing thing

Christmas Pix

Gotta run now!

Okay! We got a treadmill! Woohoo! I was a little torn initially. I don't mind running on a treadmill but it feels a little like cheating. But when we saw the ad in the local paper and went to check it out it was obviously such a good deal we'd have been idiots for passing it up, and I'd have to question my committment to this marathon too. And as it turned out it was perfect timing. The weekend after we got it home we had a snow storm. Not much by New England standards (my default setting) but a lot on an island with maybe one plow. THe roads were still more or less ice-packed yesterday, 6 days after the storm. People are driving around with chains on the tires! School was on delayed start every day this week! So, all that to say, no way was I going to risk my life running on the roads and so it was extra awesome to have the treadmill. And this mornign at 5:30 or so when I finally got up it was awesome to be able to go downstairs and pump out 7 miles before anyone else was even up (okay, the Bunny caught the last .25 mile).

Now I'm going to bundle up with the kids and go for a ice-covered pond tour. I figure that with sub-freezing temps all week we should be quite safe walking over the shallows. And maybe we'll take some more grub out to the geese. Ever since it got cold enough to freeze the pond I've been bringing them apples and pears and stale cereal. they love it and I love how they come honking and waddling over to me as soon as I walk out the door these days. They're still saucy but they need a little love too.

Happy Thanksgiving and all that

Honestly right this minute I'm feeling a little less than festive. After trying to keep my mom and her fiance's issues at arms length and let them have their own Thanksgiving without interference it seems like their relationship has finally gone off the rails. I don't really want to know. I wish it were that easy. But as I laid awake in bed way too early this morning I found myself imagining my mom feeling totally crushed with disappointment that this latest in a series of doomed relationships has gone so bad. Why can't she find a nice, steady guy who doesn't pretend to be more than he is? Maybe because she's crazy and those guys don't appeal? Whatever the reason it's a bummer and this time I hope the economic fallout doesn't completely cripple her. So anyway, I got up to check the fares to visit her instead of going home this weekend. I don't know, it's too early to call her and see if she needs me at all and if so if she would welcome a visit this weekend or if she can wait another week or so.
So there's that. And then I also feel like there must be something I could do to wake my brother up to the fact that he's missing out on a relationship for himself and his family that could be really nice. I don't know when the last time he and my dad were speaking but it's been a while. And it just makes me feel sad, for my dad and for my brother. But I just don't know what the magic words are and I'm not even sure that I'm back on solid enough footing with my brother to make them stick if I can even figure out what they are.
So it's a modern holiday season right? Complete with family crises, odd step relatives and non-communication as well as the usual task of keeping Santa alive and arranging for cards, cookies and gifts to as many friends and relatives as humanly (and financially) possible.
Ahh.

But, enough angst, I'm on vacation and it's been a nice one. We've had just enough time to reconnect with some old friends in St. Louis and I had a great time meeting a dingo here in Wisconsin. We've known each other for a couple years now and I've been following her blog for about that long and finding her life and her balancing of family, work and farming fascinating and inspiring. Actually getting the real live tour of the barn, meeting the sheep, the emu, the chickens, patting Pumpkin Pie, checking out the somewhat creepy borrowed ram, that alone was well worth the drive through Wisconsin farmland. But the real treat was the instant comfy friendiness of meeting my friend in person for the first time. The whole encounter was just so enjoyable and so lacking any weird awkwardness that you might expect in a first-date type of situation. It can be hard and nearly embarrassing trying to describe the dingos to non-dingos but I am so grateful for my friends there and the quiet space of the dingo cafe in which we are able to have conversation about anything and everything without interruptions from children, spouses or anything else.

And for that, my awesome kids, my sweet smart husband, our happy home and stable extended family I am very grateful this Thanksgiving.